Hilarious! Man Calls 911 on Himself for Driving Drunk (LISTEN)

The Polk County Sheriff’s Office released audio of a Florida man calling 911 dispatch. On himself. In a Facebook post, authorities said the man, identified as 39-year-old Michael Lester, placed the call on New Year’s Eve.

Driving while under the influence of alcohol or drugs is a serious crime. Innocent people are too often injured or killed from impaired drivers. DUI is not a laughing matter.

However…in this particular incident, nobody was hurt, so we couldn’t help but LOTO (that means we Laughed Our Tasers Off).

You will hear Sheriff Judd on the radio telling his #CrazyCriminal Stories – we figured, for those of you who don’t have a radio, all two of you, why not share those stories here for your reading pleasure?

Allow us to introduce Michael Lester of Winter Haven. On New Year’s Eve, Michael decided to call in a drunk driver. Himself. If you need to take a second to re-read that sentence, to let it sink in, we’ll wait.

Good? Alright, let us proceed. So Michael called 911, and told the dispatcher that he was driving drunk, and needed to be pulled over. The dispatcher, who did a fantastic job by the way, continually tried to get Michael to pull over, kept him talking, and directed a deputy to Michael’s location.

Fortunately, Michael was stopped before anyone got hurt. Michael first told the deputy he had only two beers (standard drunk answer). Then he changed it to three or four (slightly more accurate). He also mentioned that he had only slept four hours in the past four days. Oh, and he also said that he had swallowed meth earlier, instead of smoking it.

The attached audio is Michael’s call to 911 (edited for time), and it’s quite entertaining. Please folks, let this be a lesson to you that DUI is bad-bad-bad, because unfortunately, Michael is having a hard time learning this lesson. He has a criminal history which includes a previous DUI, as well as aggravated battery, drug possession, disorderly conduct, resisting, and hit & run.

The Polk County Sheriff’s Office had thirty DUI arrests in the month of December. Special thanks to Michael Lester, for throwing himself under the bus for #30 (we love round numbers). At least Michael wasn’t involved in a crash, and lived to see another day (and maybe he’ll see this Facebook post too. Hi, Michael!).

By the way, he was also cited for driving on the wrong side of the road, improper use of the center lane, and no seat belt – 4 charges total (maybe he likes even numbers).


Lester could not be reached for comment. Jail records obtained by Law&Crime show he remains locked up on $500 for one count of DUI.

Alex D.

Alex D is a conservative journalist, who covers all issues of importance for conservatives. He writes for Supreme Insider, Red State Nation, Defiant America, and Right Journalism. He brings attention and insight from what happens in the White House to the streets of American towns, because it all has an impact on our future, and the country left for our children. Exposing the truth is his ultimate goal, mixed with wit where it's appropriate, and feels that journalism shouldn't be censored. Join him & let's spread the good word!

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